**Updated for 2015**
I think I’m in an abusive relationship. My gal is alternately an early Spring or late Fall day.
Sometimes things seem to be going so badly between us it’s like I’ve been abandoned, all alone, on the center of a frozen Mille Lacs Lake in the middle of January. My gal will then come “pick me up”, treat me well and make me feel as if I’m riding on top of the world – like an early Spring thaw in that otherwise bitterly cold Minnesota winter. Of course, she’ll eventually insist on treating me like a harsh March snowstorm; letting me know that she’s still in charge and, like the groundhog who never sees his shadow, summer will still be a long while in arriving.
Other times, things are going great between us, but now it’s like late Fall. I just know “winter” is coming and she never fails to let me know that life’s warm victories are easily replaced by frosty nights.
It’s like I can’t win for losing with her. I don’t know if it’s bi-polar disorder, seasonal affective disorder, or simply wanton cruelty. All I do know is that she’ll invariably rotate from treating me like a King to giving me the “hammer” – moving from giving me what I want and need to taunting me and denying me everything.
I think I’m in an abusive relationship, and, my girl’s name is “Variance”.